EMERGENCY Naruto Update

The masked man’s identity has finally been revealed! When we last left our heroes, Naruto, Guy, and Kakashi, and – oh yeah – Octo-pops (although he hasn’t been doing shit) were battling the masked man, trying to prevent him from awakening the ten tailed beast, and thereby fullfill plan Tsuki No Me, which, if you recall, will turn the moon into a giant eye. Said eye will then be used to cast a gengutsu on the entire planet that makes people think that they are living in harmony with one another, and thus will end all war. Oh, and since someone will need to be the leader of this new world, the masked man has selflessly volunteered to fill that position. During last week’s episode, we learned that there is a strange connection between Kakashi and the masked man. The masked man’s ability to pass through objects turned out to be a transportation jutsu, where he transports part or all of his body to another plane. The strange thing is, that when Kakashi transports something to another plane, it hits the masked man. So both of then transport objects to the same plane, meaning that Kakashi and the masked man’s eyes must somehow be connected. So Kakashi and Naruto hatch a plan. Naruto distracts the masked man with one of his shadow clones, meanwhile Kakashi transports another of Naruto’s shadow clones to the alternate plane, then the real Naruto throws a tailed beast bomb at the masked man, forcing him to flee to the alternate plane, where the other Naruto is laying in wait for him. Then it’s a simple matter of a Rasengan attack, and the masked man’s mask is finally broken.
And the masked man is….. wait for it…. Kakashi’s childhood friend, Obito, who everyone thought was dead after he was crushed under that giant fucking boulder years ago. Remember – he’s the one whose grave Kakashi has visited nearly every day since the beginning of the series. Did they seriously plan this shit all along? That would be impressive. Anywho, remember that touching scene where he gave his eye to Kakashi while dying? That’s why there is a connection between the two. When it comes right down to it, it was a bit of a Scooby-Doo mystery, wasn’t it? Pretty much, if you were thinking it through, it had to either be him, or some new character, and there’s allready too damn many characters to keep track of.
So I’m scoring this shit as follows: 1 shot for Shit Getting Revealed. 1 shot for someone’s childhood friend betraying them, and like three or four drinks for announcements of attacks, and oh, my GOD is the only thing that I have in my house cheap gin?? Well, rules is rules..

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