This week in Consparanormal News

As in, conspiracy and paranormal. Just go with it. Look, I love a good conspiracy. Who doesn’t believe that the Greys from Zeta Reticuli are among us? Just ask Bob Lazar, who is about to come out of hiding to attend the  UFO Congress in Arizona next year. Conspiracies like Bob’s Area51 gravity drive are fun, harmless discussion starters. But when the ESA suddenly and out of nowhere drops anchor on a speeding comet that crosses paths with Earth’s orbit in a few years, well, you can go ahead and dunk me in a big vat of shit-just-got-real-juice.

Raise your hand if you think “Comet” 67P is a comet. Any takers? Why would we (ahem, EUROPE) spend billions of dollars to land on a random piece of space junk? Answer: we wouldn’t, unless there’s something nefarious going on here. I certainly won’t be surprised when, in a few years from now, we send Bruce Willis on a suicide mission to nuke “Comet” 67P.

As with all good Nasa conspiracies, this one comes with an anonymous tipster, some shady photoshopping, and–this one’s unique–some unexplained radio transmissions from the “comet”. Uh-huh. Just a random piece of space junk. Sure.

Now for the real-juice: the folks at YouTube Channel SecureTeam10 have the full scoop. Take a minute to watch this video. If you can possibly explain the webbing anomalies seen in the video, well then, I’ll just assume you are part of the cover-up. If you think this is all hogwash, and that on the off-chance it is real that we can just rely on Aerosmith’s love-child’s movie-daddy to save the world, well, dream on folks. This shit is real.

Oh, and while we’re at it, Nasa just found fish fossils on Mars. Fuck.

2 thoughts on “This week in Consparanormal News

  1. No, no, no. You’re thinking of esteemed ufologist Stanton Friedman. Lazar keeps a very low profile. His videos are classic (check ’em on youtube), I recall trading them with friends on old VHS tapes.

    Lazar YouTube: http://youtu.be/igUMDICqTpQ
    Stanton: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanton_T._Friedman

    Also, I just learned that Stanton suffered a mild heart attack back in June of this year. Here’s hoping he didn’t turn …grey… when it happened. Too soon?

    But seriously, get well, Stanton.

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